Mock Court Redux.

Today we finished our mock court exam, which is also officially the end of training. Our graduation will be some time this week, originally set for Friday but may be Wednesday now because Siobhan won’t be here Thursday or Friday. Rumor has it that we will pick up some Misdemeanor cases and work on packing our stuff and moving it up to our new desks/lab benches. W00T!
The court stuff went fine, I actually made it today, despite the marathon session we had to do to fit everyone in. My stuff was easy, though Tom did his best to give me a hard time up there. Everyone seemed to do all right, except for one or two people who were a tad borderline but that’s not my place to judge. Nor do I really care because come Monday, while we will still all be working in the same building, we will all be working different shifts and in different rooms for the most part. The point being that I won’t have to deal with the people that make me nuts on a daily basis any more. Double W00T!
I guess it will be a bit sad to not be in training anymore, for one we will have to do real work and WAY less fooling around. (pouts) Though it should be interesting to see what the influence of us 16 new people will be on the section as a whole. It could get scarry. (insert evil laugh) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

Hey! Ho!…Lets Go »« More travel Zen

More travel Zen

After an exciting Monday the rest of the week just had to be less fun. At work this week has been our mock court exam, I was supposed to go Monday but since they canceled Fridays stuff I doubt they can get through 7 people to get to me, So maybe Tuesday. Because of all the court stuff no cases this week so nothing to report there. Today was just laundry and grocery shopping…whee! Tomorrow I might do a movie, or get a haircut. I really need a haircut so I am leaning more toward that. After the court stuff is done we have about a week left in training and may get to start on misdemeanor cases. Woo! So keep an eye out for more interesting stuff coming soon.

Until then I have two funny little bits of more Zen like wisdom I picked up on my way to work this past week.

The first was a add on the subway for verizon international long distance. The original read like this:

Shanghai 10c
Moscow 15c
London 8c
Tel Aviv 8c
Rio de janerio 14c
New Delhi 28c

Well who ever used a pen and added lines and extra text that for some reason I fould quite cleaver:

Shanghai to my little friend 10c
Moscow give milk 15c
London It Again 8c
Tel Aviv he’s a bum 8c
Rio de janerio is a great actor 14c who has his own production company and appears in scorsese films quite frequently
The new delhi has great sandwiches 28c

Good stuff!
The second bit was on the side of a flatbed truck carrying sheetrock.
It simply read:

“Do not Hump Cargo”

Words to live by.

Mock Court Redux. »« Chuck Palahniuk

Chuck Palahniuk

So when I get into work today I read in the crappy little metro paper that Chuck Palahniuk is doing a reading and book signing in Midtown. At first I was mad because I didn’t know earlier so I didn’t have my books or camera with me. But I was able to take an hour of comp time and skip lunch and go home early at 2. I came home and got my camera and book and headed into the city. The reading/signing was at Cooper Union near Union Square (I think NYU is around there). I got there around 5 for a 6:30 reading and there were already about 30 people there. I got in line and waited till about 5:30 when they let us in so Chuck could do some early book/other stuff signing. I got him to sign my copy of “Pursuit of Happiness” which is a collection of short stories where Fight Club first appeared as a short story. He seemed impressed that I brought it and signed the title page of the story and stamped it with a round stamp that says “PRISON LIBRARY COPY” W00T! I also got my picture taken with him…see:

Then around 6:30 he came in and read two of his new short stories. One of which is his infamous new horror short story “Guts”. Story goes that people have passed out during readings of it before. It is really a messed up story. I will spare you the details, you will thank me really, but it will be coming out next spring in his new collection of short stories so you can see it then. He then read a really new story of his for the first time called “Hot Potting” which I thought was better then Guts, or at least can be. He says it is still in the rough draft stage but when it’s done I could see it being really good. After that he did a Q&A session throwing rubber body parts (arms, legs, hands and feet) to everyone who asked a question. Most of the questions were cool and was interesting to get to hear him talk on a wide range of stuff (most exciting is that the movie project for Survivor which was scrapped after 9-11 is back on!).

So yah all in all a great night!

I would gush more but I’m uber tired and have work tomorrow!

More travel Zen »« VG Cats – Comics

VG Cats – Comics

Best comic strip ever! Thanks to Ben for this great CSI bashing funny! VG Cats – Comics

Chuck Palahniuk »« photos

photos

Pawing through a box of pictures I have makes me realize I used to be a half way decent photographer. What happened? I mean I am still happy with the stuff I take now but looking at some of the stuff from just a few years ago I am kind of amazed that I took them. Maybe I am just in a rut. Sunday there is supposed to be this guided photo hike thing in Forest park that I am going to check out. I’ll probably just take my digital camera but after tonight am seriously thinking of breaking out my SLR again.

VG Cats – Comics »« Ohh…new survivor

Ohh…new survivor

Yes, I know it’s sad, but damn it, I am a survivor addict and will be watching the new season that starts tonight. The cast looks like clones of…..well every other season….and yet I watch anyway.

Last few days at the lab have been about the same. I had my interview with the QA guy Wednesday. They want to make sure we are all ready for the inspection. Whee. I did fine though, and he seemed happy with my answers. I also gave blood again yesterday. The crew they had there this time was, in general, more competent then the last crew they had I guess. I still was a little less then impressed with my lady trying to do me and Connie at the same time but not counting on the fact that I bleed fast. I actually ended up getting a tad dizzy, maybe un-related, but seeing as it’s never happened before I wonder if it would of had she tended to just one of us at a time. Eh…what ever. I still get my three hours of comp time (and I won a 5$ Barnes and Noble Gift card) which isn’t much but its better then nothing.

Case wise I really haven’t had anything too interesting this week. Today I did 3 Marihuana’s and a Cocaine. I would complain about getting boring cases but seeing as an “interesting” case usually is a pain in the ass I think I will just stay quiet. I will be going in on Saturday because we will be having some review stuff for our final, Final exam…the Court Room Testimony.

Fun Fun !

photos »« Talk Like A Pirate Day – September 19

Talk Like A Pirate Day – September 19

Just a heads up – Talk Like A Pirate Day – September 19

Arrrrrr….

Ohh…new survivor »« shift happens

shift happens

Well today was a fun filled day at the old crime lab. Because they want us to have time to study the SOP’s some and to get ready for our interviews and mock court (which will now start next Thursday). I had one marihuana and something that was supposed to be crack but didn’t give the right results on the tests I ran so it had to send it off for GCMS. Even then I’m not that hopefully, what ever it was it didn’t even want to dislove in the methanol. I also had to prepare and run the marihuana I had on Friday on the GC because the one I ran last week came back NCS so now I have to do all the bags. Feh! Stupid crappy pot!

Then at 1pm we had a little diversion. One of my co-workers (who I also went to UNH with) was on TV. She made an appearance on TLC’s show “Perfect Proposal”. The basic idea behind the show is the guy comes up with some wacky to propose to his girl and also thinks its a good idea to do it on national TV. In this case her BF, who I also went to UNH with, was a NYC Firefighter and set up some thing where she thought she was on a cooking show with her chef brother and gets blamed for setting off a fire alarm and wackyness ensues. What was the most fun was that while the girls watching were all “awwww” and had their tissues and stuff us guys were laughing our asses off at the whole thing. Ahh good times.

The other notable thing that happened today was we found out our tours and where we will be sitting come October 4 when we move up-stairs. I ended up pulling my last choice for a tour, the 10am-6pm shift. But the more I think about it the better it now seems. I mean for one I never really do much after work other then come home, eat, and play on the puter. So what if I do that two hours later? On the other side of things, I now get up around 5:45am….but when I start my 10-6 shift I wont have to get up till like 8 or so. W00T! Sleep! I mean, other then summer vacations I haven’t been able to sleep past 7 on a regular basis for….well …a really long time. So while I grumbled about it at the time, it actually could end up being a sweet tour to have. Plus Tom said that there may be a few slots opening up in the next few months as people retire and such, so I can see how I like it and maybe change it later if its not working out. But again its not really a big deal for me, do feel a tad bad for poor Alison, she has to commute from Milford still and she will have the same shift as me so she won’t be getting home until like 8:30 or 9:00 pm. Awww. hehehe.

Guess living in NYC does have it’s benefits to balance out its hassles.

Talk Like A Pirate Day – September 19 »« Sunday Night

Sunday Night

Apparently they closed down good old Cinema City in Hartford this past week. Tis Sad. The place was a dump but it was a fun place to work in its time. All it not yet lost though, rumor has it Crown may buy them out and re-open the place in less then a week so I’ll have to watch and see.

This up-coming week at work could be interesting. They will be interviewing us to see how we will do when we have to get interviewed for the ASCLD/LAB inspection the lab has to have in October. Whee. So on top of case work we have been studying for the interviews, focusing on some of the specific GC/MS stuff. They are all about us knowing why we are doing what we do, which is a good thing I guess but a little less pressure would be nice. I really don’t have any problem with it but a few of my classmates are starting to get a tad stressed keeping up with their case work and reading all the stuff we are supposed to read.

Speaking of cases, as of Friday I have done 33! WOOT! Though I guess things take on a whole other level when you start doing cases with defendants names on the vochers, and knowing that our work can put someone in or let them out of jail.

Holding another persons freedom in the palm of my hands (insert evil laugh here)

shift happens »« Welcome to the Alliance…Or “How I learned to stop worrying and love the spam”

Welcome to the Alliance…Or “How I learned to stop worrying and love the spam”

Today was a very wet day! Got wet going to work, was damp all morning, and got wet as work ended (fire alarm went off) and walking home. Feh! Stupid Rain!
Though rain asside work was alright. Was able to finish all my cases today plus the one I didn’t have time to get to yesterday. They were all simple marihuana cases, which was ok after that killer one I had yesterday.

I also found a fun little piece of spam in my mail box today that is funny because of how fitting it is, given my job and all. Like most spam it claims I requested to be on the mailing list, which is a lie, but I got such a kick out of the content I had to post it here to mock for all to see.

The message is below with my comments in bold.

Dear Andrew,
(Hi Spam).

You are almost certainly a victim of the government’s so-called “war on drugs.”
(Er…well not really. Actually the “war on drugs” pays my salary so I really can’t complain too much there.)

America’s drug laws are the product of ignorance, fear, and bad politics. They do little to curb drug abuse.
(True, given the case load we have at the lab I guess they do, do little curb drug abuse.)

They cost tens of billions in tax dollars.
(Saddly, little of which I will ever see.)

They imprison non-violent offenders for years, sometimes decades. They keep crucial medicines from the seriously ill.
(If by medicine you mean crack and heroin then sure. I know nothing would make me feel better if I was sick with the flu then smoking a whole lot of crack.)

My name is Ethan Nadelmann, and I am the founder and Executive Director of the Drug Policy Alliance.
(Hi Ethan I’m Andrew and I am a criminalist who plays with drugs all day.)

Our mission is to replace the failed “war on drugs” – and the failed thinking behind it – with laws and policies based on science, reason, and compassion. Our cause unites liberals, conservatives and libertarians who believe that we can no longer afford the failed approach of the past.
(Not sure I can agree with you there, while some of the drug laws are darn right stupid, there is also the fact that I like power and food and right now said laws pay for the roof over my head so…)

In the months ahead, we hope you will choose to be one of the more than 100,000 Americans who have joined with us – as advocates, as friends, and as financial supporters.
(ohh sorry but some how I don’t think so, thanks for the offer though.)

Meanwhile, we invite you to get to know us and our cause a bit better. For the next few weeks we will be sending you our bi-weekly e-newsletter – a compendium of drug reform-related news, action opportunities, and background information. At any time, if you come to the conclusion that the Drug Policy Alliance is not for you, you are welcome to follow the directions below to remove yourself from our list.
(“Oh boy, even more junk email, and bi-weekly junk email at that! Luckly it was in my hotmail account which is such a spam hole I don’t even use it anymore. Go Gmail!”.)

Our approach to the Alliance community is interactive – many of our best ideas have come from the grassroots. We welcome your input, either as a participant in our online community, or by responding to this email with your thoughts and suggestions.
(Some how I doubt my recomendation of more funding for the crime labs wouldn’t go over too well with this group. )

Meanwhile, if you have a few minutes, peruse our comprehensive and easy-to-navigate Web site at www.drugpolicy.org.
(I do have to say it looks like a semi-decent site from what I could tell but I didn’t really read it much.)

Again, welcome aboard. I look forward to your continued interest and involvement.
(Thanks, but again I sort of doubt it.)

See! Now wasn’t that fun? I guess spam does serve some function from time to time after all.

Sunday Night »« Mom said there would be days like this…

Mom said there would be days like this…

Well today was just an extra fun day at the lab. At first it looked like an easy day, I only had to pick up two cases! But then I saw that one of the two had two envelopes with it. Meaning they couldn’t fit all the stuff in one or “Not a good sign”. Well it turns out that Bob picked this case out special so he can use it to show and tell the other students what you would do if you were un-lucky enough (ie. Me) to get such a case. So I finally get it back after the show and tell and get to work. Reading the voucher it says I have 63 bags of marihuana goodness to look forward to. Whee! A lot of bags but not too bad, or so I think. One thing that complicated matters is that the stuff is in the two envelopes, again not so bad, I just have to keep the two separate. Then I open the envelopes only to find three different size bags. Again, with out going into too much detail and explaining the NYPD weighing protocol in graphic detail, this is a bad thing. To make a long story short I ended up having to test over thirty bags to meet the weight charge and it took me all day of work plus an hour of over time to finish just this one case.
Sigh. I guess the days of the simple cases are over, I should of enjoyed them more while they lasted.

Welcome to the Alliance…Or “How I learned to stop worrying and love the spam” »« War on drugs

War on drugs

Is it a sign that I have already been working at the lab too long that while watching “Cops: The War on Drugs” on TV, I think about how I would go about specifically testing the various drugs they find on the show? Like the crack pipe and marihuana pipe they took of one lady, all I could think was “well I would likely do a methanol wash on the crack pipe and send it to GC/MS for a cocaine MI.”

Mom said there would be days like this… »« Twinkies Sushi

Twinkies Sushi

I found this when I was randomly surfing the web. It would be great for my next party…..if i ever had any party’s….
Hostess Twinkies Sushi

War on drugs »« Nifty

Nifty

I am liking this new software more and more. I found a nifty plugin that automaticly takes acronyms and links them to a short definition when you hover your mouse over them. This ought to help those of you who arent forensic science folk understand a bit more what the hell I am talking about some times. I only have a few words defined so far but ill keep it updated as I go. For example if I were to type GC/MS you can hold your mouse over it and see a short definition. Again if there are any words you think I should define drop me an email and let me know.

Other then playing with fun web stuff not much going on today. Went for a nice walk over in Forest Park this morning and might clean up here a bit this afternoon. I have a long weekend (W00T for no work Monday) so I am really not in a big rush to do anything this weekend.

Twinkies Sushi »« New Software

New Software

After reading some posts on the forums it is apparent that Greymatter (The weblog software I use) is as good as dead. The people who are in charge of updating it right now have said that after the next set of updates and bug fixes is made that will likely be the last of any major changes they make to it. It effectively would need to be totally re-written which would be a waste of time really since there are other sets of scripts (like this nifty wordpress one that I am trying out) that can do the same things, but better. I used the included tool to import all my old blog posts so they are all still there. All in all most readers probably wont see any major change, the differences are mostly behind the scenes stuff. But if you notice any problems or anything drop me an email and let me know.

Thanks!

Nifty »« 3$ pot